Heartbreaking and hilarious and INSPIRING. I love that you have protected yourself and your peace by cutting communication with your family. Shows emotional intelligence and discipline. Your relationship with Joe was a good bridge—a good transitional experience to prepare you for the next great love whom will be neither narcissist nor sociopath but instead wonderful. I toast your commitment to the artist’s life. You are not alone. I’m with you in spirit!
I’ve noticed your sad story is commented to by women,other than myself. This is because women are more interested in interpersonal relations… even people who are complete strangers, which I find puzzling. Life of your own should provide enough suffering!
Fucking “likes.” They are absurd. I don’t “like” this post, not at all. Don’t want to see a damned heart made red in response to my attempt to signal, “I hear you, get you, wish all the luck in the world for you.” And maybe to indicate that you still have power in your words and make me feel stuff. Mostly I am further inspired to shrug off shit that annoys me, dive deeper into the many things that make me feel good. rooting for you, Cintra. And believing in you. And hoping that will do the trick.
“I feel like emotionally, I give you buckets of gold, and I get $4 back from you in coupons,” I told him recently. It was one of the few times he laughed."
My first reaction was going to be to say “damn, I’m sorry,” but then you got to the lack of running jokes in your relationship and man, it is ALL about the running jokes. The baby monkeys with the wire mamas breaks my heart, every time. I am glad you are leaning in to your art. And that bit about AI writing a better screenplay? Well that just says something about screenplays, doesn’t it? Glad to have found you here on Substack, I was a fan way back in your SF Examiner days.
You are awesome, and like talented, awesome, artists everywhere walking through a normie world, it’s SO hard to find that matching human who “gets” you. You are so good at what you do tho that total strangers continents away “get you” … thank you for making me laugh SO many times, and know that at least a dozen of your epic descriptive phrasings permanently entered my friends group’s private in-joke language the minute we read them, and that’s decades ago now. Shine on, you crazy diamond ❤️
You do deserve better. And frankly, I can’t believe you were with someone for two years who didn’t make you laugh. You have the best, quickest laugh. I hope I hear it again sometime soon ❤️ Happy new year, talented friend. (“penguin’s tit” - literal lol)
Cintra Sweeeeetie! You are LOVED and ADORED by many people. You are not estranged from your family, you have simply hit the pause button. You are an artist through and through. Keep being exactly who you are. Snorkels and kisses, Jen
Well damn, I thought that was settled. But no running jokes? That would have been bleak. So you're pretty clear on what IS settled, and good on you, because art's what will endure no matter what: vita brevis, but ars longa. (Real fucking longa.) Altogether a beautifully expressed, mightily uplifting breakup story. Sending hugs and (virtual) warm cinnamon rolls. ONWARD!
Late to this. I never know what to say in response to news like this. But I hear you and am sending the best version of a hug through comments that I can.
I am sorry you are going thru this, Madame Cintra. It is a very uncomfortable thing to go thru. But speaking as someone who has now mysteriously and miraculously been w the same guy for 25 years, the only advice I have to give is to be open to being friends with people first. Andy is the first guy I was ever platonic friends with for a year plus first. I never imagined a different version of the relationship. And the unsurprising reason that is such a good idea is that by the time you stumble into intimacy, you ACTUALLY KNOW THE PERSON. Because after all....why would it ever work to become intimate with someone you dont even know? Meanwhile its smart to be comfortable alone. That ability and energy also makes an adult relationship more likely to work. ONWARD into ART!
Heartbreaking and hilarious and INSPIRING. I love that you have protected yourself and your peace by cutting communication with your family. Shows emotional intelligence and discipline. Your relationship with Joe was a good bridge—a good transitional experience to prepare you for the next great love whom will be neither narcissist nor sociopath but instead wonderful. I toast your commitment to the artist’s life. You are not alone. I’m with you in spirit!
Thank you beautiful Courtney!!!!
I’ve noticed your sad story is commented to by women,other than myself. This is because women are more interested in interpersonal relations… even people who are complete strangers, which I find puzzling. Life of your own should provide enough suffering!
My god, you have a real gift with images.
“Cold as a drowned Norwegian corpse, but absolutely upstanding.”
“Cold as a penguin’s tit, but a prince all the same.”
Just… wow. Thanks, Cintra. A brilliant essay, as always, but this one fully illuminated off the screen.
Thank you so much, Ms. Evans!
Those two images jumped off the page
Chuckled out loud
I’m a quarter Norwegian without much connection to my heritage. But this made sense. 🤣
Fucking “likes.” They are absurd. I don’t “like” this post, not at all. Don’t want to see a damned heart made red in response to my attempt to signal, “I hear you, get you, wish all the luck in the world for you.” And maybe to indicate that you still have power in your words and make me feel stuff. Mostly I am further inspired to shrug off shit that annoys me, dive deeper into the many things that make me feel good. rooting for you, Cintra. And believing in you. And hoping that will do the trick.
lou J of course I have no choice but to “like” your comment. 😉
Thank you so much Lou. I feel your support.
Struggling to imagine the extent of the shiftiness. Here’s a happy-sad picture meant for you.
This was my favorite part and I relate:
“I feel like emotionally, I give you buckets of gold, and I get $4 back from you in coupons,” I told him recently. It was one of the few times he laughed."
My first reaction was going to be to say “damn, I’m sorry,” but then you got to the lack of running jokes in your relationship and man, it is ALL about the running jokes. The baby monkeys with the wire mamas breaks my heart, every time. I am glad you are leaning in to your art. And that bit about AI writing a better screenplay? Well that just says something about screenplays, doesn’t it? Glad to have found you here on Substack, I was a fan way back in your SF Examiner days.
So nice of you to remember the Examiner! Thanks miss Lady. I feel ya.
Just surrender and get a gay husband. I’m available.
I’m in
You are awesome, and like talented, awesome, artists everywhere walking through a normie world, it’s SO hard to find that matching human who “gets” you. You are so good at what you do tho that total strangers continents away “get you” … thank you for making me laugh SO many times, and know that at least a dozen of your epic descriptive phrasings permanently entered my friends group’s private in-joke language the minute we read them, and that’s decades ago now. Shine on, you crazy diamond ❤️
You put a chandelier in my heart. Thank you.
You do deserve better. And frankly, I can’t believe you were with someone for two years who didn’t make you laugh. You have the best, quickest laugh. I hope I hear it again sometime soon ❤️ Happy new year, talented friend. (“penguin’s tit” - literal lol)
Love you Johnanna!!!!
And, yea, she shall be known throughout the land as Dawn Quixote, champion of art and vanquisher of the mundane.
"I’m starting to realize that my entire life has been one wire monkey entanglement after another." Hahahahahahahahahaha Happy Holidays Cintra.
Cintra Sweeeeetie! You are LOVED and ADORED by many people. You are not estranged from your family, you have simply hit the pause button. You are an artist through and through. Keep being exactly who you are. Snorkels and kisses, Jen
Well damn, I thought that was settled. But no running jokes? That would have been bleak. So you're pretty clear on what IS settled, and good on you, because art's what will endure no matter what: vita brevis, but ars longa. (Real fucking longa.) Altogether a beautifully expressed, mightily uplifting breakup story. Sending hugs and (virtual) warm cinnamon rolls. ONWARD!
Thanks ms. Darrow! thanks for the hugs and cinnamon rolls. XXX
Feel ya …..
Cintra, you are incredibly interesting, and that is a hell of an attribute.
Deep thanks Sir. It is a privilege to be thought of that way.
Late to this. I never know what to say in response to news like this. But I hear you and am sending the best version of a hug through comments that I can.
thanks Bucky. It felt pretty inevitable, eventually, after the initial shock.
I am sorry you are going thru this, Madame Cintra. It is a very uncomfortable thing to go thru. But speaking as someone who has now mysteriously and miraculously been w the same guy for 25 years, the only advice I have to give is to be open to being friends with people first. Andy is the first guy I was ever platonic friends with for a year plus first. I never imagined a different version of the relationship. And the unsurprising reason that is such a good idea is that by the time you stumble into intimacy, you ACTUALLY KNOW THE PERSON. Because after all....why would it ever work to become intimate with someone you dont even know? Meanwhile its smart to be comfortable alone. That ability and energy also makes an adult relationship more likely to work. ONWARD into ART!
Yes Madame! I applaud all of your points. You are as wise as you are talented. XXXXX