18 Comments
Nov 18, 2022Liked by Cintra Wilson

Love it. If only this were effective criticism today. Trouble is, elites have wrapped themselves in an invincible cloak of woke, virtue-signaling causes. Against which any attack, will redirect and multiply that energy back at the critic, in a deadly social ostracism which is often unsurvivable. YOU are the contagion we need to wipe out, CIntra Wilson -- the elites would declare. ...and we are vaxxing the minds of children right now, so your diseased thoughts will never be able to infect this society again.

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That's pretty much what happened to me, actually.

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Nov 18, 2022Liked by Cintra Wilson

Brutal. Though we know -- win, lose, or tie -- who the virtuous one is. YOU.

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Nov 18, 2022Liked by Cintra Wilson

Also, humility from having our superior talent and ideas trampled, or ignored, is just another one life's lessons. Which only a lucky few get to learn. To what benefit perhaps we know not yet :)

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I certainly don't know yet.

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That warms the cockles of my little black heart.

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Nov 16, 2022Liked by Cintra Wilson

No apologies required. I remember this whip-crack-of-a-column when it was first pubbed on Salon. Anyone who can successfully employ the sacrament of Extreme Unction within a referential constellation featuring Tom Cruise, Scientology, and Hollywood sanctimony deserves multiple pirate troves of shiny, golden-wrapped chocolate doubloons. (REAL gold wrapping) Still a winner. And you were still kinda just getting started, Oscar assessment-wise. Them were the days.

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Remember when writing was still a viable job?

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And when quality and attention-to-craft were rewarded with greater opportunity. Today, I look at the copy written online by major league media outlets and my nose hairs curl: banal; incoherent; rife with errors both grammatical and flat-out contradictory; brazenly unedited. I think, “Some ‘writer’ is getting PAID to phone this in—literally, via voice software—to the Batcave for publication.” The same applies to much of the waning print media desperate for a consumer dollar, any dollar. Editors and editorial standards are dismissed en masse. It’s a disturbing cycle. The genuine up-and-coming talents don’t learn to improve their work without the guidance of savvy editors.

I knew it was probably over when I began to see scores of thirty and forty year-olds not only hoarding and reading Manga but having serious discourse about it in cafes. Even so, watch the bestseller lists for my next shattering opus, ‘The Girl Who Conquered the Murder Hornets Only to be Crowned Mistress of Vampire Rune Shadows Where the Catfish Yodel All Day’.

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Nov 16, 2022Liked by Cintra Wilson

Aw, Cintra, I have been reading (and loving) your writing for about five years now. So glad that I was able to follow you on Substack after getting kicked off of Fakebook so many times that I finally realized that it was me and just got off it altogether. You are, without a doubt, the undisputed snarkasm queen of pop culture criticism and seeing how well these older articles remain fresh and poignant just proves it. But, alas, after hundreds, if not, thousands, of spot-on observations, who woulda thunk that J-Lo had twenty years left in her?!?

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Certainly not me. But it must be said: she made a comeback. Remember when she went all Latino and married Mark Anthony and disappeared for a while?

But the formidable Mrs. Affleck came back like a bad penny. I sort of admire her fortitude.

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Nov 19, 2022Liked by Cintra Wilson

It was, in its way no big deal, just JR was asked to vacate her seat for the name on the place-card [something like that --security was tight after 9/11] and she pitched the full, table slamming, "Do you know who I am?" The staff backed off and Denzel vibed JR away shortly, so no Mace or tasers were deployed. I spent some years doing Hollywood gigs like this, and this was the purest "pulling rank" I ever saw. Sean Connery and Michael Caine -- "Oh, pizza!" -- those guys were menschen. Charlize and Salma, sweethearts! The insecure: shitheads vicious as weasels on speed Bad company, good material.

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I hope you wrote about it somewhere!!

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Nov 18, 2022Liked by Cintra Wilson

I was working for Wolfgang Puck that night, assigned to be Denzel's "shadow" at the Governor's Ball ("Stick close and get him whatever he wants, WHATEVER he wants, and make it snappy.") Denzel treated me cordially and never asked me for anything, so I got to stand back and be a fly on the wall. There was some...behavior around Denzel's calm eye of the posturing. The aforementioned Julia Roberts stopped by the table and ... hoo boy. Details in my forthcoming novel/memoir, soon as I figure out which it is to be.

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Aww come on! Don't leave us hanging!

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Nov 16, 2022·edited Nov 16, 2022Liked by Cintra Wilson

I'd forgotten this debacle entirely. I watched some of it because I was so besotted with Jackson's initial Tolkien outing that I wanted to see how it would do, but I turned the thing off when Berry's fit became too much to take. She was miscast in the role she won for (a character that would have been fine if it had been assayed by Queen Latifah or Viola Davis), but though she was okay, her display at the ceremony left me with not much use for her since. I missed Newman's acceptance speech, which I read about later, and according to me is the greatest acceptance speech in Oscar history: "I don't want your pity." Another great one, C.

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Oh man, I'll have to find that speech! I love Randy Newman.

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You should have gotten a Pulitzer for "acceptance tantrum" alone.

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